Captionize

Thank god he was faster than a speeding bullet.

"Chinese Miracle Cream."

The "Full Service" vending machine.

Instructions:

"Start at the bottom left and work your way clockwise."

"Yes, I wear them on the outside. Quit staring."

"Check out the bitch."

Nature's best-kept secret: How flying fish land.

"Patsy, sweetheart, aren't you getting a little old for pushies?"

"It's quite nice, but do you have anything with a bigger kitchen?"

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